50 Dumbest Things Bush Ever Said

48. "You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.'' —Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

43. "I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport." —Washington, D.C., Oct. 3, 2001

40. "Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties." —discussing the Iraq war with Christian Coalition founder Pat Robertson, as quoted by Robertson

37. "We need an energy bill that encourages consumption." —Trenton, N.J., Sept. 23, 2002

36. "After standing on the stage, after the debates, I made it very plain, we will not have an all-volunteer army. And yet, this week — we will have an all-volunteer army!" —Daytona Beach, Fla., Oct. 16, 2004

35. "Do you have blacks, too?" —to Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001

32. "It is white." —after being asked by a child in Britain what the White House was like, July 19, 2001

31. "I couldn't imagine somebody like Osama bin Laden understanding the joy of Hanukkah." —at a White House menorah lighting ceremony, Washington, D.C., Dec. 10, 2001

30. "For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It's just unacceptable. And we're going to do something about it." —Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001

27. "I'm the master of low expectations." —aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

26. "I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things." —aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

20. "My plan reduces the national debt, and fast. So fast, in fact, that economists worry that we're going to run out of debt to retire." —radio address, Feb. 24, 2001

15. "The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him." —Washington, D.C., Sept. 13, 2001

14. "I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority." —Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

11. "Can we win? I don't think you can win it." —after being asked whether the war on terror was winnable, "Today" show interview, Aug. 30, 2004

9. "I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job." —to a group of Amish he met with privately, July 9, 2004

8. "Major combat operations in Iraq have ended. In the battle of Iraq, the United States and our allies have prevailed." —speaking underneath a "Mission Accomplished" banner aboard the USS Abraham Lincoln, May 1, 2003

7. “We found the weapons of mass destruction. We found biological laboratories … And we'll find more weapons as time goes on. But for those who say we haven't found the banned manufacturing devices or banned weapons, they're wrong, we found them." —Washington, D.C., May 30, 2003

6. "Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere!" —President George W. Bush, as he narrated a comic slideshow during the Radio & TV Correspondents' Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 24, 2004

4. "There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again." —Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

3. "Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country." —Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

2. "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." —Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

1. "My answer is bring them on." —on Iraqi insurgents attacking U.S. forces, Washington, D.C., July 3, 2003

For the complete list, click here.

Math Jokes

Everybody loves math jokes. At least I think everybody does...

Anyway, here are some funny ones.

















More here and here...

Revealed: Britain's stupidest call centre customers

Here are a couple of stupid centre calls from Britain.

Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?"

Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?"

Customer: "It was on the door to the travel centre".

Operator: "They're our opening hours".

--------

Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"

Operator: I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".

Caller: "In the user guide it clearly states I need to unplug the fax machine from the wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Can you give me his number?"

Operator: "I think you mean the telephone point on the wall".

--------

Caller: Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"

Operator: " Doesn't the name of the product give you a clue?"

--------
Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.

Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"

Caller: "Yes. That''s what it says on the label: Woven in Scotland".

--------

On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: "I haven't got a pen, so I''m steaming up the window to write the number on"."

Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".

Customer: "OK" .

Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No" .

Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"

Customer: "No" .

Tech Support: "OK. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?"

Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".

--------

Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"

Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

--------

Credit from Mirror.co.uk.

It's over

Christmas is over, the parties, the food, the gifts, boxing day (December 26 in Canada), the endless cash outlay. Finally, I can rest and enoy the time off. No wait...we have work on the 27th! Darn, just when I though I can finally get some rest, I have to go back to work.

Sometimes I wish I can just take a week off and do nothing. No laundry, no work to worry about, no cooking, no ironing. Nothing. Just sit around, watch TV or play Xbox or read a good book. But then again, I really hate taking vacations because it makes it harder to go back to work when your routine has changed.

I was almost late for work this morning because I completely forgot I have work today. Today being the 27th. I wanted to stay home and clean my office, by office I mean the little corner I have in the house which is part of the living room that I call my office.

I also wanted to clean up and backup my computer. But then I really didn't want to do anything during Christmas break. I really wanted to get a new Macbook this year. But I just upgraded the memory on my laptop so that's going to be good for at least another year.

I can't believe I always thought I had 512Mb of RAM on that thing and I always wondered why it was so slow. Turns out I only had 256Mb! Duh! Now after upgrading the RAM, I has a new lease on its life. The speed is tolerable now, not agonizing anymore. Oh well, New Year's is coming, so I'll probably do it this Saturday.

Bought my son a Lego for his Christmas present. I told my wife to wrap it, but she took it out of the cabinet and left it in the room, forgot to hide it or wrap it before my son came home from school. Of course, he went to the room and immediately saw the Lego. Wouldn't stop crying because we didn't want him to open it. Totally ruined the surprised.

Let's see...what else did I do...oh yeah, play several games of NBA Live 2006 on the Xbox. The longest time I've every played the whole year of 2006 and probably only the 8th time I played ever. Never have time to play games anymore. Except maybe when my son is asking me to play with him. Of course, his favorite games are Star Wars Lego, which is ok, but I like sport games more.

Thinking about it now, the short holiday isn't as bad. Because if I were in the Philippines, we would be having more parties before the 25th and a couple more after. Which leave me totally with no time for myself to just sit down and do nothing. Even watching TV in the Philippines is boring as I really don't like most of the shows there. Where else can you watch a whole day TV marathon of Star Trek: Enterprise or Married with Children but in Canada!

Oh yeah, the traditinal Star Trek movies marathon was running on December 25. It seems Space the Canadian Sci-Fi Channel runs Star Trek Movie Marathons every Christmas, from Star Trek to Star Trek:Nemisis. I saw the same marathon on the Sci-Fi Channel when I was in the US a few years back during Christmas. I guess this is their version of Christmas tradition, Star Trek instead of "A Wonderful Life". My sister also told me there was a Star Trek: Voyager marathon a few days before. Now that's what I call TV! What more can you ask for when you can switch from watching the Enterprise crew battling aliens to the burping and obnoxious antics of Al Bundy? No boring stuff like "The Buzz" or Kris Aquino. Bleh!

Overall, it was a good Christmas. Quiet, relaxing and just time with friends and family. Now I need to get working on my goals for 2007!

By the way, I just read that J.J. Abrams, the producer of Alias and Lost will be producing and writing a new Star Trek movie. It's not titled yet and it is called Star Trek XI at this time. The movie is said to be out in 2008. Don't know if this is definite yet as it is a rumour at this time.

There's also a new Transformers Movie Trailer, that should be a good movie. I haven't seen a movie for a while, the last movie I saw was Superman. That was a bummer, although it was good, the story line was just a rehash of the first Superman movie. Hello! Luthor destorying a city so he can own real estate? With all of Luthor's brain, is that the most he can think of in terms of crimes to commit? And what? His girlfriend ends up saving Superman? I know this is a late movie review, but I saw the original Superman movie after I saw Superman Returns. Just blows my mind how similar the plots are. I mean, come on! Lex is supposed to be a criminal mastermind! Not Donald Trump!

Anyway, the real movie I want to see is On a Pale Horse. It's a book by Piers Anthony regarding the Incarnations of Immortality. They are Death, Time, War, Fate, Earth, Satan and God. Where each Incarnations are actually offices where mortal take their place to assume the office. Like Death is not just a spirit, but a mortal killed the previous officeholder and assumes his place. It's being produced by Jamie Foxx and Marc Silvestri. I hope it gets done and I really hope it's good.

Office Prank

This is the funniest office prank I've seen. A fellow worker went on vacation and will return after Christmas, the boss and a co-worker wrapped everything on the guy's cubicle with tin foil. And I mean everything! Scissors, monitor, chair, mouse, pen, everything!

Here are some pictures.













































This is just hilarious! Here's the link to the guy who made this prank.

Internet

It's amazing what you can find around the Internet (you know I can't think of any topic to write about).

Here are a couple of things that might be of interest.

Gigantic NES Controller - takes two people to play a game of Mario Bros.

Movie Mistakes - check out the best movie mistakes made so far.

Secret Worlds - move through space from beyond the milky way down to the sub-atomic level.

Ad wars - ad wars between BMW, Audi, Subaru and Bentley.

More ad wars - more ad wars between car manufacturers.

Winnie from The Wonder Years - Stuff magazine's photoshoot of Danica McKellar who plays Winnie Cooper in "The Wonder Years". Oh by the way, she graduated Summa Cum Laude at UCLA in Mathematics and co-authored a scientific paper in a peer-revied physics paper. The paper proves a theorem that become known as Chayes-McKellar-Winn Theorem (Wiki).

Perfect gift for the perfect (geek) girl

Are you a geek?
Are you a rich geek?
Do you have a girlfriend who's also a certified geek?
Do you want to really impress her this Christmas?
Looking for the perfect gift?
Look no further!

Introducing USB drive that's a girl's best friend. A diamond encrusted USB drive that's solid platinum and loaded with 350 white diamonds of 5.8 carats.

Only $40,000!


















I bet you no one will lose this baby!

Screwy Snowman

During the huge snowfall we had two weeks ago, my son and I decided to build a snowman. He wasn't content to just build an ordinary snow man, but he wanted a snowman family. A Daddy snowman, a Mommy snowman and a little boy snowman.

Not contented with that, I decided to do snowman inspired by Calvin and Hobbes comics. Here are the pictures...

Favorite Movies

I was talking to my friend the other day about movies we love and I never realized we liked pretty much the same movies. I'm talking about old movies from the 70s and 80s, so I decided to compile a list of movies that I love and perhaps someone else would discover them and love them as I do.

1. Trading Places(1983) - Dan Ackroyd and Eddie Murphy
A funny movie about two wealthy brothers who own a Wall Street firm doing a social experiment to see if they can turn a snobbish investor (Ackroyd) into a bum and a street bum (Murphy) into a respectable member of society. This movie is the main reason I got interested in investing.

2. Coming to America(1988) - Eddie Murphy and James Earl Jones
Eddie Murphy plays a wealthy prince who wants to find this true love in America. There are some reference to Trading Places in this movie. Like when Eddie Murphy gave $25,000 to two old guys on the street. They're the two wealthy brothers in Trading Places.

3. Brewster's Millions(1985) - Richard Pryor and John Candy
Montgomery Brewster, a minor league baseball player inherits $300 million from his rich uncle, but there's a catch. He has to waste $30 million in 30 days and not tell anyone about the deal or he gets nothing. A classic Richard Pryor movie.

4. Top Secret!(1984) - Val Kilmer
An American Rock and Roll singer (Kilmer) becomes involved in a Resistance plot to rescue a scientist imprisoned in East Germany. A lot of subtle jokes and reference where you have to keep your eyes open or you'll miss the punchline.

5. Weird Science(1985) - Kelly LeBrock, Anthony Michael Hall, Ilan Mitchell-Smith, Bill Paxton and Robert Downey Jr.
Two words -- Kelly LeBrock. She plays every geek's dream girl. Someone they created in their computer that came to life.

6. Real Genius(1985) - Val Kilmer and Gabriel Jarret
Another geek movie, Lots of scientific references which might turn you off but a brilliant movie if you're geeky enough.

7. Groundhog Day(1993) - Bill Murray and Andy MacDowell
Bill Murray plays a weatherman who finds himself living the same day over and over. I have not seen anybody who've seen this movie that didn't like it.

8. History of the World: Part I(1981) - Mel Brooks
9. Young Frankenstein(1974) - Gene Wilder, Peter Boyle and Mel Brooks
10. To Be or Not to Be(1983) - Mel Brooks
11. Spaceballs(1987) - Mel Brooks
What can I say? Mel Brooks is probably one of the best comedy writer/director ever!

12. Once Bitten(1985) - Jim Carrey, Lauren Hutton
A vampire countess(Hutton) needs to drink the blood of a virgin (Carrey) in order to keep her eternal beauty. This is the very first movie of Jim Carrey that I've seen. He wasn't popular at that time yet and I would say the movie is only average. But if you were a teenager when you first watched this movie on a lazy afternoon, it's kind of unforgetable.

As you can probably see, I love watching comedies. Feel free to add your to the list so I can check it out.

A solution to the energy problem

Here's an interesting article from Wired News.

Google's Mountain View, California, headquarters is getting a 1.6-megawatt solar system -- enough to power about 1,000 homes -- that will feed about 30 percent of the complex's power demand. About a third of the 9,000 solar panels Google's installing will take the form of overhanging parking shades at the million-square-foot campus in Mountain View.

Last year, Kyocera inaugurated the first ever Solar Grove in a parking lot in San Diego. The project used the empty space above the open parking area and built "solar trees" that provides shades to the cars and passengers as well as collecting solar energy and converting it into a 235 Kw Solar Electric Generating System.

Just imagine, instead of building concrete waiting sheds, they built solar tree sheds instead that will provide shade from the sun and rain while collecting solar energy. Any country would have a sustainable and renewable supply of electricity. It's a great idea to use the wasted space and make it productive.

The malls in the Philippines alone, if they built these solar trees, it would probably be enough to supply at least one-fourth of their annual energy use. Think about it, it saves money, provides electricity and it's good for the environment! It's a win-win-win solution to the country's growing energy problem.

How much for a miracle?

I got this e-mail and I normally just delete forwarded messages. I thought this was worth posting.

======================

A little girl went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar from its hiding place in the closet.

She poured the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Three times, even. The total had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.

Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above the door.

She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some attention but he was too busy at this moment. Tess twisted her feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good. Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the glass counter. That did it!

"And what do you want?" the pharmacist asked in an annoyed tone of voice. I'm talking to my brother from Chicago whom I haven't seen in ages," he said without waiting for a reply to his question.

"Well, I want to talk to you about my brother," Tess answered back in the same annoyed tone. "He's really, really sick... and I want to buy a miracle."

"I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist.

"His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?"

"We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry but I can't help you," the pharmacist said, softening a little.

"Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough, I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs."

The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He stooped down and asked the little girl, "What kind of a miracle does your brother need?"

"I don't know," Tess replied with her eyes welling up. I just know he's really sick and Mommy says he needs an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to use my money."

" How much do you have?" asked the man from Chicago.

"One dollar and eleven cents," Tess answered barely audibly.
"And it's all the money I have, but I can get some more if I need to."

"Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man. "A dollar and eleven cents---the exact price of a miracle for little brothers."

He took her money in one hand and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said "Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the miracle you need."

That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was completed free of charge and it wasn't long until Andrew was home again and doing well.

Mom and Dad were happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to this place.

That surgery," her Mom whispered. "was a real miracle. I wonder how much it would have cost?"

Tess smiled. She knew exactly how much a miracle cost...one dollar and eleven cents ... plus the faith of a little child.

In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need..
A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law.. I know you'll keep the ball moving!

Here it goes. Throw it back to someone who means something to you!

A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end. It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends. But the treasure inside for you to see is the treasure of friendship you've granted to me.

Today I pass the friendship ball to you.
Pass it on to someone who is a friend to you.
MY OATH TO YOU...
When you are sad.....I will dry your tears.

When you are scared.....I will comfort your fears.
When you are worried.....I will give you hope.
When you are confused.....I will help you cope.
And when you are lost....And can't see the light, I shall be your beacon.....Shining ever so bright.
This is my oath.....I pledge till the end.

Why you may ask?.....Because you're my friend.

Signed: GOD
INSTANTLY WHEN YOU RECEIVE THIS LETTER, YOU ARE REQUESTED TO SEND IT TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE, INCLUDING THE PERSON WHO SENT IT TO YOU

Coherence

For all you Mac lovers out there as well as you Windows fanatics. Parallels Desktop just released a free beta version of their new Parallels for Mac which includes a new feature called Coherence.

Coherence allows you to run Windows programs within your Mac enviroment as though it was a local Mac application.

It allows you to hide your Windows Desktop and lets you run the Windows app in their own window. Don't believe me? See the video below.




I know my next computer will be a Mac!

What were they thinking?

I know this might be funny in the beginning, but it will eventually get annoying? I mean, a humping dog USB key?

My only question is, what were they thinking?

James Kim

James Kim, the senior editor of CNet was found dead on Dec 6, 2006. This is just so sad, though I don't know him, a lot of people who visit CNet are familiar with him. He's the senior editor of CNet and you usually see him on their videos reviewing products.

I don't know why his death kind of had an effect of me just like the death of Steve Irwin. Was it because they seemed to be both familiar? Were they familiar because we see them on TV or the Internet a lot? Although we can't compare their contribution to society, but was it because we lost someone who did contribute to society in their own way? Or was it because like me, they're both fathers who love their family who left behind very young children?

The reports say he climbed through a 5 mile canyon to find help for his family. The rescuers said what he did was "superhuman". Trekking through freezing weather with no food climbing down boulders, logs, icy creeks and nearly impenetrable brush.

This is a person who lived in the city his whole life and has little outdoor experience. He was thinking on his feet. Make you wonder sometimes what you'll do if you were placed in that situation.

Here is a video tribute of James on CNet and here is the link on his ordeal.

Laptop the Terminator will love

Here's a laptop that the Terminator will love to use. NEC designed this laptop that can withstand a 3 foot drop and temperatures from -56 to 50 degrees Celsius.

Just makes me wonder, how rough do people use their laptops? I mean, if they're using it in Antartica, I can imagine something like that. But how would this look in the office? I'm imagining someone going to the office in battle fatigue to use this laptop. :)

Find out more here...