Miles Davis - Human Nature

Video of Miles Davis playing Michael Jackson's Human Nature. Great rendition.

Blood feud kills Pacquiao-Mayweather fight

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

==================
LAS VEGAS, Nevada, United States—Manny Pacquiao will not fight Floyd Mayweather next March because a blood testing stalemate wiped out what could have been the richest fight in boxing history, promoter Bob Arum said Thursday.

The planned showdown between Filipino hero Pacquiao, a seven-division world champion, and unbeaten US star Mayweather could have brought each fighter as much as $40 million in a rare Las Vegas mega-fight spectacular.

Arum, Pacquiao's promoter, said Mayweather's request to have stricter US Anti-Doping Agency (Usada) testing methods, including possible random blood tests within days of the bout, killed any hope of reaching a deal.

"It's over," Arum said. "As far as I'm concerned the fight is over."

For boxing fans, it was like a Christmas Eve theft of their favorite gift, a long-awaited showdown between the generation's two recognized pound-for-pound superstars.

Mayweather-backing Golden Boy Promotions chief executive Richard Schaefer told the New York Times that calling off the fight would be "a big void for boxing" and "a setback for the sport and for these fighters."

Arum, who said every other aspect of the contract had been agreed upon, held out some hope the fight might come off later in 2010, but promised nothing.

"Can it be revisited in the fall? We'll see," Arum said.

An original May 1 date was scuttled because Pacquiao wants to run for Congress in his homeland and elections are in May. "Pac-Man" is expected to fight March 13, but against American Paul Malignaggi, 27-3 with five knockouts.

Mayweather was insisting on greater blood and urine testing than normal. Pacquiao was willing to commit to tests in January, 30 days before the fight and after the bout.

But Mayweather insisted on a Usada-administered program that opened the door for possible random blood tests within days of the fight.

Neither fighter had ever tested positive for a performance-enhancing substance under typical Nevada dope tests, which involve only urine samples that are taken just before and after the fight.

Arum saw Mayweather's insisting on random blood testing as a way out to avoid having to weigh in and face Pacquiao, who did not want blood drawn so close to the fight, Arum told the Grand Rapids Press.

"Floyd, to me, is a coward. Floyd never really wanted the fight and this is just harassment of Pacquiao," Arum said.

"Mayweather pressed for blood testing even up to the weigh-in. He knew that Manny gets freaked out when his blood gets taken and feels that it weakens him. This is just harassment and to me just signaled that he didn’t want the fight."

Arum had set a Thursday deadline to solve the testing issue, saying Pacquiao saw Usada as biased in favor of American Mayweather and unwilling to compromise their test procedures to accommodate a compromise.

"They are viewed by the Pacquiao side as being partisan. He doesn't want to use them," Arum said. "I don't want to use them. They're so inflexible they can't be used."

Mayweather, 40-0 with 25 knockouts, was regarded as the world's top pound-for-pound fighter before a 19-month layoff that ended last September.

Pacquiao, 50-3 with 38 knockouts, staked his claim on the pound-for-pound crown in Mayweather's absence by knocking out England's Ricky Hatton in the second round last May and stopping Miguel Cotto in the 12th round last month.

Boxing telecaster HBO had tried to negotiate a compromise Thursday to no avail, Arum said, and Golden Boy namesake Oscar de la Hoya tried his best, writing in a blog that Pacquiao needed the Usada testing for his own good.

"If Pacquiao doesn’t want to do this ... or believes he’ll be weakened by blood tests, then that raises question marks," De La Hoya wrote.

"People have to wonder why doesn’t he want to do this? Why is it such a big deal? A lot of eyebrows have been raised. This is not good at all. If you have nothing to hide, then do the test."
===================

I don't know which one to believe now. Pacquiao for saying Mayweather is a coward or Mayweather for saying what's wrong with the blood test.

But De La Hoya talks big, after being defeated by Manny Pacquiao. He didn't question Manny Pacquiao's blood when they fought, why now?

Here's the link to an article from Golden Boy Promotions about the fight.

So if this fight doesn't go through, the question is, will every other fighter against Pacquiao will now request for Pacquiao to have the same blood test?

I think Pacquiao's reluctance is more due to beliefs than to anything else. But who knows.

Woman Knocks Down Pope on Christmas Mass

An apparently deranged woman jump the the barriers in St. Peter's Basilica and knocked down Pope Benedict XVI as he walked down the main aisle to begin Christmas Eve Mass on Thursday. 2 Americans, Marybeth Burns and Steve Burns, captured that moment on their cameras.

Watch the video.

BANNED New Moon Trailer!

Great Zoo Ad

I always love imaginative advertisement. Here's and ad for a zoo I saw recently.

Paper Airplane Guinness Record

Takuo Toda broke the Guinness Record for longest flight for a paper airplane at 27.9 seconds.

Check out the videos.

Man Throws Bicycle at Thieves on Scooter!

The description on the video says that a man thew his bicycle after two thieves riding a scooter snatched a purse.

People are awesome!

Angry Pacquiao strikes back at Mayweathers

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

===================
A FURIOUS MANNY PACQUIAO lashed back at the Mayweathers and executives of Golden Boy Promotions, who were blaming him for the snafu that sidetracked negotiations for his March 13 megafight with Floyd Jr.

“I can’t believe these guys can lie without batting an eyelash and they would even make it appear that I am the culprit for the delay of the fight and saying that I don’t want it to happen,” Pacquiao told Philboxing.com in Filipino.

“Liars go to hell. They should be man enough and own up to their words,” added Pacquiao, who showed proof that Mayweather Jr. had accused him of using performance enhancement drugs.

Pacquiao, who was named by BoxingScene as its 2009 Fighter of the Year, the third time in four years the Filipino was accorded the honor, said the Mayweathers (Floyd Jr., Floyd Sr. and Roger), had claimed in past interviews that he was into some kind of “roids” (steroids).

“It’s all over the Internet. They all went on record and there is no denying as to who is lying or not,” said Pacquiao, the world’s pound-for-pound king.

Pacquiao said the black propaganda is aimed at systematically besmirching, tarnishing and destroying his legacy as one of the best fighters of all time.

What incensed Pacquiao further was an audio recording in October, where Floyd Jr. maliciously imputed that the Philippines is a producer of the best PEDs.

Pacquiao said Floyd Jr. and those who are guilty need to get punished, whether it be in the courts or in the ring.

He stressed that a lawsuit will be filed against his detractors whether or not his fight with Floyd Jr. will push through in Las Vegas.

Team Mayweather and Golden Boy Promotions want Pacquiao to undergo a new set of drug testing procedures other than those already required by the Nevada State Athletic Commission.

Pacquiao reiterated that he has no objections to drug testing.

“I will provide any specimen, whether it be blood or urine samples, just right after the fight but not a day or two before, for obvious reasons.”

Another Philboxing report stated that Dr. Alex Pineda, who is the only doctor accredited by the World Anti-Doping Agency to test athletes, is in General Santos City to conduct the urine test on Pacquiao as directed by the Nevada State Athletic Commission Wednesday afternoon.
=====================

So who's actually chicken? Remember this video of Floyd Mayweather Jr. after Manny Pacquiao's fight with Cotto?

Seems like this fight is gonna be all talk and see who gives in to the psy-war.

Jokes

According to the Internet: Students in a Harvard English 101 class were asked to write a concise essay containing four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery. The only A+ in the class read: "'My God,' said the Queen, 'I'm pregnant! I wonder who did it.'"


Serving as a Marine recruiter in western North Carolina, I found a young man who met all the requirements and was ready to enlist. I explained the importance of being truthful on the application, and he began filling out his paperwork. But when he got to the question "Do you own any foreign property or have any foreign financial interests?" he looked up at me with a worried expression. "Well," he confessed, "I do own a Toyota." We enlisted him the next day.


As a benefits specialist in the Marines, I traveled around delivering lectures on life insurance. After listening to a dozen of these talks, the corporal who drove me from base to base insisted he knew my entire spiel by heart.

"Prove it," I said.

So at the next base the corporal delivered the speech. As he ended his flawless performance, a Marine asked, "What do I pay for insurance after I leave the Corps?"

My driver froze. Was the jig up? Would ignorance of the facts force him to crumble? Not my corporal!

"Marine," he said sternly, as he pointed to me, "that is such a dumb question that I am going to let my driver answer it."


Toward the end of the school year, the sixth-grade teachers decide which of their students should be accelerated in certain subjects in the seventh grade. When a child is chosen, his parents are notified. When one boy was accelerated in science and math, his mother wrote to the teacher: "I think this is quite an honor for someone who just tried to make two quarts of lemonade in a one-quart pitcher!"


I was a brand-new attorney in practice alone, and I had a likewise inexperienced secretary fresh out of high school. The importance of proofreading the results of my dictation was highlighted one day when a reminder to a client's tenant to pay her rent or suffer eviction was transcribed as follows: "You are hereby notified that if payment is not received within five business days, I will have no choice but to commence execution proceedings."


I was once a legal secretary to a young law clerk who passed the bar exam on his third try. This fledgling attorney worked hard on his initial pleading, which should have read "Attorney at Law" at the top of the first page.

After I submitted the finished document for his review and signature, I was embarrassed when he pointed out a critical typing error. "Must you rub it in?" he asked.

I had typed: "Attorney at Last."


While getting dressed one morning, I decided I'd been spending too much time on my computer: I caught myself checking the lower right corner of my makeup mirror to see what time it was.


A couple of hours into a visit with my mother she noticed I hadn't lit up a cigarette once. "Are you trying to kick the habit?"

"No," I replied, "I've got a cold and I don't smoke when I'm not feeling well."

"You know," she observed, "you'd probably live longer if you were sick more often."


I walked into the lobby of my apartment building recently and was greeted by this notice: "To whoever is watering these plants, please stop. They are the property of the building, and our maintenance staff will take care of them. They may have already been watered, in which case you will be over watering them. Besides, these plants are fake."


A human-resources director found herself at the Pearly Gates. "We've never had a human-resources director here before," said St. Peter. "So we're going to let you spend one day in heaven and one in hell, and you can choose where to spend eternity."

"I'll go to hell first and get it over with," said the HR director.

To her surprise she spent a wonderful day with her former fellow executives, playing golf on a beautiful course. The game was followed by a sumptuous meal at the clubhouse. When she returned to heaven, she spent her day there sitting in a cloud, playing a harp.

"Have you decided where you'd like to spend eternity?" St. Peter asked.

"Yes," she said, "heaven was great, but too boring. I choose hell."

"Okay," said St. Peter, "off you go."

This time when she arrived in hell, she found everything barren and desolate. Confused, she confronted Satan. "Where's the golf course?" she asked. "And where are my friends?"

Satan smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting you; today you're staff!"


My granddaughter asked why I called my husband Hon.

"It's a term of endearment," I explained.

My husband mumbled, "After more than 40 years, it's a term of endurement."


Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town. That meant, as a customer service rep for the electric company, I was dispatching repairmen right and left. When one lineman called a customer to get her exact address, he was told, "I'm at Post Office Box 99."

The weary lineman replied, "Ma'am, I'll be coming to you in a truck, not an envelope."


An adorable little girl walked into my pet shop and asked, “Excuse me, do you have any rabbits here?”

“I do,” I answered, and leaning down to her eye level I asked, “Did you want a white rabbit or would you rather have a soft, fuzzy black rabbit?”

She shrugged. “I don’t think my python really cares.”


As a speech pathologist, I often ask patients to tell me a personal story in order to get them to open up. Here's one man's tale:

"My friend wanted a boat more than anything. His wife kept refusing, but he bought one anyway. 'I'll tell you what,' he told her. 'In the spirit of compromise, why don't you name the boat?' Being a good sport, she accepted. And when her husband went to the dock for his maiden voyage, this is the name he saw painted on the side: For Sale. "

More Ferry Deaths Feared

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

====================

MANILA, Philippines—The death toll from the sinking of the MV Baleno 9 on Dec. 26 off Verde Island could be much higher than first believed. Dozens of passengers reportedly had been left off the official manifest, according to the Coast Guard.

A total of 132 passengers supposedly boarded the ferry that sank off the Batangas island 37 minutes into its voyage, said Sen. Richard Gordon, chair of the Senate blue ribbon committee that conducted a hearing on the sea tragedy Tuesday.

Of the 132 passengers and crew aboard the roll-on, roll-off vessel, six died and 72 survived, Gordon said.

Fifty-four are missing based on the manifest and as reported by relatives.

The Senate blue ribbon committee also learned that the skipper of the Baleno 9 was not a certified ship captain but merely a “major patron.”

Capt. Jimmy Andal, who was earlier reported to have survived the sinking, is now listed as among the missing persons.

The committee also found that the ferry was designed to only ply inland waters and not the open sea. The ship sank in “open waters” between Batangas and Mindoro, maritime officials said at the committee hearing Tuesday.

Coast Guard Commandant Wilfredo Tamayo said Andal was not “a certified master mariner as he was only a major patron.”

A major patron is a ship officer “not schooled” but has had long maritime experience, according to Tamayo.
====================

They never learn do they? For a country surrounded by water, you would think they would have better ways to monitor shipping lanes and maritime activities. How many more needless deaths will it take for people to learn?

Jokes 2009

Unclean
Soon after being transferred to a new duty station, my Marine husband called home one evening to tell me he would be late. "Dirty magazines were discovered in the platoon quarters," he said, "and the whole squad is being disciplined."

I launched into a tirade, arguing that Marines should not be penalized for something so trivial.

My husband interrupted. "Honey, when I said ‘dirty magazines,’ I meant the clips from their rifles hadn’t been cleaned."

Musical Dummy
My musical director wasn't happy with the performance of one of our percussionists. Repeated attempts to get the drummer to improve failed. Finally, in front of the orchestra, the director said in frustration, "When a musician just can't handle his instrument, they take it away, give him two sticks and make him a drummer!"

A stage whisper was heard from the percussion section: "And if he can't handle that, they take away one of his sticks and make him a conductor."

Duck in a Bar
This duck walks into a bar, and asks the bartender, “Do you have any grapes"?

The bartender says, "No we only sell beer here". The duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks back into the bar and asks the bartender, "Do you have any grapes"?

The bartender says, "No I told you we only sell beer, and if you ask me again I'm going to nail your beak to the bar.” So the duck leaves.

The next day the duck walks back into the bar, and asks the bartender “Do you have any nails"? The bartender says "no".

The duck asks "Do you have any grapes"?

Case Study
I was having a drink at a local restaurant with my friend Justin when he spotted an attractive woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering his courage, he approached her and asked, "Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She responded by yelling at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't come over to your place tonight!"

With everyone in the restaurant staring, Justin crept back to our table, puzzled and humiliated. A few minutes later, the woman walked over to us and apologized.

"I'm sorry if I embarrassed you," she said, "but I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying human reaction to embarrassing situations."

At the top of his lungs Justin responded, "What do you mean, two hundred dollars?"

Climate Change
According to a news story, if global warming continues, in 20 years the only chance we'll have to see a polar bear is in a zoo. So in other words, nothing is going to change.

Numbing
At the busy dental office where I work, one patient was always late. Once when I called to confirm an appointment, he said, "I'll be about 15 minutes late. That won't be a problem, will it?"

"No," I told him. "We just won't have time to give you an anesthetic."

At the Bar
Do you serve ladies at this bar?

No, sir, you have to supply your own.

The Pay Raise

Our Mexican maid asked for a pay increase.

My wife was very upset about this and decided to talk to her about the raise.

She asked: 'Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?'

Maria: 'Well, Senora, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you.'

Wife: 'Who said you iron better than me?'

Maria: 'Your husband said so.'

Wife: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.'

Wife: 'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?'

Maria: 'Your husband did.'

Wife: 'Oh.'

Maria: 'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'

Wife: (really furious now) 'Did my husband say that as well?'

Maria: 'No Senora...the gardener did.'

Wife: 'So how much do you want?'

The Age Gap

At 85 years of age, Roger married Jenny, a lovely 25 year old.

Since her new husband is so old, Jenny decides that after their wedding she and Roger should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together.

After the wedding festivities Jenny prepares herself for bed and the expected knock' on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Roger, her 85 year old groom, ready for action. They unite as one. All goes well, Roger takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep..

After a few minutes, Jenny hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Roger, Again he is ready for more 'action'. Somewhat surprised, Jenny consents for more coupling. When the newly weds are done, Roger kisses his bride, bids her a fond good night and leaves.

She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it - Roger Is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more 'action'. And, once more they enjoy each other.

But as Roger gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, 'I Am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Roger.'

Roger, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Jenny and says: 'You mean I was here already?'

The moral of the story:

Don't be afraid of getting old, Alzheimer's has its advantages.

New Karate Kid Movie

There's a new remake Karate Kid movie in the works, this time instead of a Japanese martial arts master, the twist is that the kid goes to China and is bullied so he was mentored by a Kung Fu master.

The Kung Fu master is played by Jackie Chan and the kid is Will Smith's son Jaden Smith.

I don't really like the aspect of a remake. But I find the movie intriguing in some ways. I always like Jackie Chan I guess.

Watch the trailer.

Christmas Lights Hero

You've heard of Guitar Hero right? Well here's Christmas Lights Hero!

I saw this video on Youtube where a guy in L.A. rigged his Christmas Lights to look like Guitar Hero. It's playable with the Wii wireless controller too!

Awesome!

Why Men Are Never Depressed

Men Are Just Happier People--What do you expect from such simple creatures.

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can do your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Did You Know?

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand ...

And "lollipop" is the longest word typed with your right hand. (Bet you tried this out mentally, didn't you?)

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".? (Are you doubting this?)

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet. (Now, you KNOW you're going to try this out for accuracy, right?)

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes). (Yep, I knew you were going to "do" this one.)

There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous. (You're not doubting this, are you?)

There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious." (Yes, admit it, you are going to say, a e i o u)
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. (All you typists are going to test this out)

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. (Some days that's about what my memory span is.)

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years. (I know some people that could do this too.!)

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that also)

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.
The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. (Good thing he did that.)

The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

Now you know more than you did before!

Eileen and Her Husband Bob Went For Counseling After 25 Years of Marriage

Eileen and her husband Bob went for counseling after 25 years of marriage.

When asked what the problem was, Eileen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking Eileen to stand, embraced her, unbuttoned her blouse and bra, put his hands on her breasts and massaged them thoroughly, while kissing her passionately as her husband Bob watched with a raised eyebrow!

After a few minutes the therapist stepped away, Eileen buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down while basking in the glow of being highly aroused.

The therapist turned to Bob and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week... Can you do this?'

Bob thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf.'

Meaning of The Twelve Days of Christmas

Got this from an e-mail, very interesting so I thought I'd share it.

=======================

There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled me. What in the world do leaping lords, French hens,swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't come out of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?

This week, I found out.

From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics.

It has two levels of meaning: the surface meaning plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Each element in the carol has a code word for a religious reality which the children could remember.

-The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.
-Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments.
-Three French hens stood for faith, hope and love.
-The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke & John.
-The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.
-The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.
-Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit--Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy.
-The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.
-Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit--Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control.
-The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments.
-The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.
-The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.

So there is your history for today. This knowledge was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening and now I know how that strange song became a Christmas Carol...so pass it on if you wish.'

Merry (Twelve Days of) Christmas Everyone!

Panic Attack!

This video was made by a man in Uruguay for around $300 and now he landed a Hollywood contract for $30 million to turn this video into a full length film.

Star Trek (Single-Disc Edition)

Just Pencils

A pencil maker told the pencil 5 important lessons:

1.) Everything you do will always leave a mark.
2.) You can always correct the mistakes you make.
3.) What is important is what is inside of you.
4.) In life, you will undergo painful sharpenings, which will make you a better pencil
5.) To be the best pencil, you must allow yourself to be held and guided by the hand that holds you.

Life In The New Millenium

Don't Mess With Old People

An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, have you ever danced?" The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance... never really wanted to."

A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna' dance now," and started shooting at the old man's feet. The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.

When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.

The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.

The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands, as he quietly said, "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's ass?"

The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir..... but... I've always wanted to."

There are two lessons for us all here:

Don't waste ammunition.

Don't mess with old people.

CNN Hero of the year near-victim of snatching

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

======================
MANILA, Philippines—CNN hero of the year Efren Peñaflorida was nearly victimized by a suspected robber as the former was stepping out of the Ninoy Aquino International Airport on Friday afternoon.

Rezcel Fajardo, a colleague of Peñaflorida at the Dynamic Teen Co., said Peñaflorida was about to board a car around 1:30 p.m. when a man got near him and tried to snatch a pouch from his bag.

But the thief accidentally dropped the pouch, drawing the attention of Peñaflorida and his colleagues.

Fajardo said the pouch only contained Penaflorida’s personal hygiene items.

She said they brought the suspect and his companion to the airport police for investigation.
=======================

Unfortunately, that's how we treat our heroes. Other than Manny Pacquiao. When Efren arrived, he was met by one person while Many was meet by a horde of people. Efren was robbed while Manny is surrounded by bodyguards.

Efren was given a small rally by a few people. While Manny was given a parade and the whole country celebrated.

Talk about having a misguided sense of priorities.

Mayon Volcano Eruption Imminent

From CNN.

======================
CNN) -- Philippines authorities Tuesday started evacuating about 50,000 people living around the island nation's most active volcano after it oozed fiery lava and belched clouds of ash.

A large-scale eruption was forecast as imminent.

The Philippine Institute of Volcanology and Seismology raised the alert level up a notch on Monday night to level 3. Scientist Alex Baloloy told the Philippine News Agency (PNA) that under level 3, "a full-blown eruption is expected to take place within weeks to days."

He said seismic instruments detected 83 volcanic quakes, a majority of which were tremors associated with rockfalls.

People in Albay province, about 466 kilometers (290 miles) south of the capital, Manila, flocked to town centers to catch a glimpse of glowing lava cascading down the slopes of Mayon. The volcanic mountain soars 2,464 meters (8,077 feet) into the sky and has erupted 49 times since the first documented erupted in 1616.

Ash fell on the town of Guinabatan, prompting its mayor to predict an unwanted sort of white Christmas, PNA said.

Provincial Gov. Joey Salceda, ordered mandatory evacuation for residents of 45 towns and cities within a radius of 6 kilometers (3.7 miles) around Mayon, including Legazpi, Ligao, Tabaco, Daraga, Camalig, Guinobatan, Malilipot and Santo Domingo.

The Albay Public Safety Emergency and Management Office said 9,946 families or 47,285 people were expected to be moved to safer ground within 72 hours, PNA reported.

Salceda, who canceled a planned trip to Denmark for the global climate conference in Copenhagen, said he will meet with the provincial disaster coordinating council Tuesday to discuss emergency measures in case of an eruption, according to PNA.

The Philippines is situated in the so-called Ring of Fire, an arc of fault lines circling the Pacific Basin that is prone to frequent earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. Mayon's most violent eruption, in 1814, killed more than 1,200 people and devastated several towns. Its last major eruption was in 1993.

Since then, it has emitted ash and spewed lava but remained restless.
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Full story and picture at CNN.com.

ABBA To Be Inducted Into Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame

That's weird, I just read that ABBA will be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2010. I did not realize that ABBA sang rock and roll. I guess "Take A Chance" could be considered rock and roll with its beat.

Along with ABBA, Jimmy Cliff, Genesis, the Hollies and the Stooges will also be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2010.

Read the full story here.

10 Greatest Job In The World

I found this list of the 10 greatest jobs in the world.

The list goes as

1. Paradise Island Caretaker.
2. Luxury Bed Tester.
3. Resort Waterslide Tester.
4. Professional Prostitute Tester (you read that right!).
5. Wine Tester and Blogger.
6. Candy Taster.
7. Condom Tester.
8. World of Warcraft Tester.
9. Director of Fun at Museum.
10. Bike Rider-Photographer for Google Maps.

See the full list and descriptions here.

Chicken Man plays "What is Love" on Pianica

Awesome! Reminds me of the movie "A Night At The Roxbury.

Change Blindness

Interesting experiment on how we look but don't see.

A special case of information-selection by the human cognitive system. The brain seems to select the information worth to process, or most relevant, at every instant, in almost every context. This might produce some very specific phenomena such as what psychologists call "Change Blindness".

Great Philosophical Humor Regarding Women

It's rough out here in the real world.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
- David Bissonette

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
- Sacha Guitry

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
- Anonymous

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, 'What does a woman want?
- Dumas

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
- Sigmund Freud

'Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.'
- Anonymous

'There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage.'
- Sam Kinison

'I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't.'
- James Holt McGavra

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Patrick Murra

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.....
- Nash

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
- Anonymous

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
- Henny Youngman

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
- Rodney Dangerfield

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: 'Wife wanted'. Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'
- Anonymous

First Guy (proudly): 'My wife's an angel!'
Second Guy: 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'
- Anonymous

Never Argue With A Woman

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?'

'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?')

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'

'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'

'For reading a book,' she replies,

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her again,

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading'

'Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.

'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.

'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.'

'Have a nice day Ma'am,' and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also
think.

Ukrainian student dies from exploding chewing gum

This is the weirdest thing I've read today.

A Ukrainian chemistry student was killed when a stick of chewing gum apparently exploded in his mouth, Ukrainian media report.

RIA Novosoti, the Russian news agency, says the incident occurred while the unidentified 25-year-old student at Ukraine's Kiev Polytechnic Institute was working at a computer at his parents' house in the city of Konotop.

"A loud pop was heard from the student's room," ukranews.com reports, quoting an aide to the police chief . "When his relatives entered the room they saw that the lower part of the young man's face had been blown off."

The report says a forensic examination found that the gum was covered with an unidentified chemical substance, thought to be some type of explosive material.

Full story here.

Eighty Six

An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up.

The doctor asked him how he was feeling, and the 86-year-old said, "Things are great and I've never felt better. I now have a 20-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child! So what do you think about that Doc?"

The doctor considered his question for a minute and then began to tell a story. "I have an older friend, much like you, who is an avid hunter and never misses a season."

"One day he was setting off to go hunting. In a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun. As he neared the lake, he came across a very large male beaver sitting at the water's edge. He realized he'd left his gun at home and so he couldn't shoot the magnificent creature. Out of habit he raised his cane, aimed it at the animal as if it were his favorite hunting rifle, and went 'bang, bang'!"

Miraculously, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead.

"Now, what do you think of that?" asked the doctor.

The 86-year-old said, "Logic would strongly suggest that somebody else pumped a couple of rounds into that beaver."

The doctor replied, "My point exactly."

Comelec ousts Padaca

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

======================
MANILA, Philippines—The Commission on Elections (Comelec) Tuesday ordered Isabela Gov. Grace Padaca to vacate her post to give way to former Gov. Benjamin Dy, saying the latter won in its recount by a thousand votes.

The Comelec Second Division ruled in favor of Dy almost three years after the 2007 gubernatorial election.

Commissioner Nicodemo Ferrer said Padaca should leave Isabela’s top position because Dy was the rightful winner.

“Wherefore, the Commission Second Division resolves … to grant the instant petition, to annul the proclamation of protestee, and to direct the protestee to vacate the office of the provincial governor of Isabela and relinquish the same to protestant,” the division said in its decision.

Dy received a total of 199,435 votes, while Padaca got 198,384 votes, a lead of only 1,051 votes, according to the Comelec’s appreciation of votes.

After Ferrer read the dispositive portion of the decision, Dy and his supporters clapped.

Padaca did not attend the promulgation. Her lawyer immediately left the session hall but said the Padaca camp would appeal the case.

“I am glad that the Comelec saw the basis of glaring election fraud in Isabela as shown by markings on the ballots,” Dy said in a statement distributed immediately after the promulgation.

In his electoral protest, Dy said there were thousands of ballots marked for his opponent with the same handwriting. The Dy camp protested the ballots from 13 Isabela towns, including the provincial capital of Ilagan.

Padaca was declared governor in 2007 after getting 17,007 more votes than Dy.

30-year hold ended

She ended the Dy family’s almost 30-year hold of the top leadership in the province when she defeated then reelectionist Gov. Faustino Dy Jr., Benjamin’s brother, in the 2004 election.

After graduating magna cum laude from the Lyceum of the Philippines in 1984, she worked as a radio commentator for Radyo Bombo.

Padaca, a 2008 Ramon Magsaysay awardee who is with the Liberal Party (LP), will seek a third term next year against another member of the Dy clan, Isabela Rep. Faustino Dy III, a brother of Faustino and Benjamin.

Benjamin Dy, a known ally of the Arroyo administration, is the official candidate of Lakas-Kampi-CMD in the May 2010 elections for a mayoral race in the province.
======================

So the Dy clan, who has been holding the top post in Isabela for 30 years and is a political ally of GMA lost to a woman in a wheelchair with no previous political experience by cheating to win the seat for governor of Isabela.

Makes sense.

Food Ad Tricks: Helping Kids Understand Food Ads on TV

Kind of old, but it's a behind-the-scenes look at how burgers (and fries) are made to look
their best for television. It's the reason why the food you see on TV is not the same as in person.

Funny Filipino Signs 4

So pag nag order ako nang dalawang ham burjer at isang putlong, pipti payb yun diba?

Victoria's Secret Commercial By Michael Bay

Director Michael Bay, known for directing movies like Bad Boys, Transformers, Armageddon and Pearl Harbor directs the latest Victoria's Secret commercial.

Includes everything Michael Bay is know for, cars, helicopters, motorcycles and explosions. Oh yeah, it also includes women in lingerie. What more can you ask for?

Gov’t arms, ammo found in Ampatuan homes

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

======================
MANILA, Philippines – The military expressed surprise at how powerful weapons and thousands of bullets supposed to be kept in the government armory ended up virtually in the backyard of the Ampatuan clan.

Wearing bulletproof vests, soldiers and police the other day dug up antitank weapons, assault rifles and machine guns from a vacant lot a few hundred meters from one of the houses of the Ampatuan family—a known political ally of President Macapagal-Arroyo—in Shariff Aguak in Maguindanao province.

Some of the firearms and the boxes of ammunition bore the markings of “Department of National Defense Arsenal,” “PNP [Philippine National Police] Camp Crame,” police said.

Sen. Rodolfo Biazon, former AFP chief of staff, said he was “aghast” at the find and said he would ask for a Senate investigation next week on who was responsible for giving such a huge arms cache presumably to the Ampatuans.

“Only the military can have this weapon,” he insisted in a phone interview. “Nobody can possess them, except for the military and the police, once in a while.”

PNP chief Jesus Verzosa was taken aback on learning that the recovered firearms included two antitank weapons. He said only government forces were allowed to purchase and carry these kinds of weapons.

“We can estimate that these types of weapons could supply a battalion of soldiers,” Verzosa told reporters in Camp Crame.

Armed Forces spokesperson Lt. Col. Romeo Brawner Jr. said the 260 boxes of 5.56-mm ammunition that were dug up were exclusively manufactured by the government arsenal in Bataan for the AFP and the PNP and other uniformed personnel.

The discovery of the weapons and ammunition cache came 10 days after gunmen allegedly linked to the Ampatuan family slaughtered 57 people, including dozens of journalists, and followed appeals from around the country and from around the world for Ms Arroyo to crack down on the Ampatuans.

In a follow-up raid Friday, security forces also searched the mansion of Mayor Andal Ampatuan Jr. of Datu Unsay town, who is facing 25 counts of murder over last week’s slaughter. He is now detained at the National Bureau Investigation in Manila.
======================

My question is, why are they even surprised? Most provincial governors and mayors have these. What else would they use to supply their private armies? These people should stop feigning ignorance.

So the question is, now that they found these guns, will they be charged for it? Probably not.

How To Erase Boredom

Just click on the picture above, click on play,
then leave the mouse alone , sit back and
enjoy a piece of creative brilliance.

Photos of Maguindanao Massacre

I found these photos from a friend of a friend.

Warning, the following photos are not suitable for children. Make sure you protect your computer lest your vomit damages your keyboard.

If you think this massacre is appalling, just remember that this is just one of the many types of massacres that happen in the Philippines. Things like this happens almost every week, we just don't hear about it.

Here's the interview given by Buluan Vice Mayor Esmael Mangudadatu describing what happened to his wife.

"My wife's private parts were slashed four times, after which they fired a bullet into it. They speared both of her eyes, shot both her breasts, cut off her feet, fired into her mouth. I could not begin to describe the manner by which they treated her."

Ready?

The Corporate Ladder

Mayweather-Pacquiao fight nearly finalized

From Yahoo Sports.

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The much-anticipated bout between Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Manny Pacquiao is all but set for March 13, a source told Yahoo! Sports.

Mayweather has agreed to terms and promoter Bob Arum is making a trip to Manila, Philippines, to finalize a deal with Pacquiao, the source said.

Las Vegas, Dallas and New Orleans are the front-runners to host the bout, which is expected to become the highest-grossing boxing match in the sport’s history.

Pacquiao is the top pound-for-pound fighter in nearly every major ranking, including Yahoo! Sports. Mayweather is No. 2 in most rankings and was No. 1 in nearly all of the polls before he briefly retired in June 2008.

Pacquiao is coming off a 12th-round stoppage of Miguel Cotto on Nov. 14 at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas, a bout in which he won the World Boxing Organization welterweight championship and erased fears that he is not a legitimate welterweight.
=======================

Looks to be an exciting match!

Full story here.

Priest likens Arroyo’s descent to Jesus Christ

From the Philippine Daily Inquirer.

======================
LUBAO, PAMPANGA—Allies compared her to Jesus Christ for “coming down to serve.” They said that unlike former presidents who plotted coups, she would fight in the open and defend herself against corruption charges after she leaves Malacañang.

Crowds estimated at several thousand cheered President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo Tuesday when she returned to her hometown to file her certificate of candidacy (CoC) for representative of the second congressional district of Pampanga.

Ms Arroyo’s term as president ends in June next year and her decision to vie for a seat in Congress next May is unparalleled for a Philippine leader.

Seizing on this, Fr. Roland Moraleja advised Ms Arroyo to “be not afraid of this unprecedented move.”

‘Blasphemy’

“Do not believe you are diminishing the power of the [Office of the] President. Ating metung a taung migbaba ba yang sumuyo—I Kristo (There was a person who came down to serve us—Jesus Christ),” Moraleja said in a homily.

The special Mass, concelebrated by 22 priests, was beamed live to crowds outside through two huge monitors installed on the patio of St. Augustine Church here.

A “blasphemy” was how Pampanga Auxiliary Bishop Pablo Virgilio David called the use by Moraleja of Jesus Christ as an example to justify Ms Arroyo’s bid for a seat in the House of Representatives.
======================

I guess it's not too far fetched. She has spoken to God right?