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3 Cost Effective Ways to Solve Metro Manila's Traffic Problem

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The Facebook page of ANC 24/7 is asking for its reader's suggestion on how to solve Metro Manila's traffic problem. This got me thinking, "what is the best way to solve Metro Manila's traffic problem?" It's easy to make suggestions, what's hard is the implementation and the cost of implementation. So what is the the best way to solve Metro Manila's traffic problem and the most cost effective solution? Punitive Fines Add caption First of all, any implementation will definitely cost money, a lot of money. The cause of the traffic mess is the people themselves so it's only right that those causing the traffic problem should be fined and the fine should hurt. That way, the fines will pay for the cost of enforcing the law. The fines should start at P500 and goes up every week if you don't pay it within 15 days. To enforce this and prevent people from ignoring the fine. It will be tied to their driver's license or car registr
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Bongbong talks to Noynoy


Bongbong: Can we talk?
NoyNoy: Who you?
BongbongG: Kapal mo! you deleted my number na?
NoyNoy: Kupal ka pala eh. sino ka ba?
Bongbong: Gago! senator BONGBONG here.
NoyNoy: Tae ka! Why would I have your #?

Bongbong: Di ka ba talaga pwedeng makausap nang matino?
NoyNoy: Di tayo close, you know that!
Bongbong: Ulol! we have a lot of things in common, tandaan mo ‘yan.
NoyNoy: Magkaiba tayo.
Bongbong: ‘Di ah! pangalan pa lang natin, pareho na! bong-bong! noy-noy!
NoyNoy: Tanga! anong pareho dun!? magkaiba ‘yon. ferdinand ka, benigno ako.
Bongbong: See? kapangalan pa natin ang ating mga ama.
NoyNoy: Bobo! junior ka, the third ako. malaki ang difference no’n.
Bongbong: Pati sa mga kapatid natin, may similarity tayo. ‘yong panganay naming si ate Imee, saksakan nang ‘tigas ng ulo noong dalaga. Kapag nagustuhan ang lalaki, nagrerebelde.
NoyNoy: Sira! hindi ganun ang panganay naming si ate ballsy.
Bongbong: Ha-ha-ha! sinong may sabing si ballsy ang tinutukoy ko?
NoyNoy: Huwag mong idamay si viel, tahimik ‘yon.
Bongbong: Sige na nga. regards na lang kay kris. joke!
NoyNoy: Namemersonal ka na!
Bongbong: Ikaw ang nagsimula!

NoyNoy: Fault ko pa? sino bang sumisira sa diwa ng edsa? singapore your face! I’ve got two words for you: “martial law!”
Bongbong: Ah gano’n? babalikan na naman natin ang nakaraan? do not provoke me!
NoyNoy: Really? here’s another: “marcos cronies!”
Bongbong: Oakyu ka! “kamag-anak incorporated!”

NoyNoy: “Plaza miranda bombing!”
Bongbong: “Mendiola massacre!” Hoy! Wala kang alam sa history! Si joma sison ang nambomba sa plaza miranda! ‘yon ang nasa libro ni ka Jovy Salonga!
NoyNoy: Ah basta!
Bongbong: Ha-ha-ha naubusan ka na ng bala!

NoyNoy: Noong panahon ng tatay mo, walang freedom of the press!
Bongbong: Noong panahon ng nanay mo, walang kuryente!

NOYNOY: Marcos billions sa europa!
Bongbong: Whatever! Hacienda Luisita!
NOYNOY: Engot! n five years, ipapamahagi na namin ‘yon!
Bongbong: I don’t believe you! gawin mo muna!

NOYNOY: Wala ka na sa Bagong Lipunan. wake up!
Bongbong: Wala ka na sa poder ng nanay mo, grow up!

NoyNoy: Teka nga! bakit ka ba text nang text?
Bongbong: Eh bakit reply ka nang reply?
NoyNoy: Ano ba talagang gusto mo?
Bongbong: Simple lang, state funeral and an honorable burial para sa aking tatay sa Libingan ng mga Bayani.

NoyNoy: That’s not for me to decide.
Bongbong: I’m not surprised.
NoyNoy: What do you mean?
Bongbong: Wushuuu! aminin mo, hindi naman talaga ikaw ang nagdedecide sa government kundi ang mga taong nakapaligid sa ‘yo eh!

NoyNoy: That’s democracy.
Bongbong: That’s weakness.

NoyNoy: Hindi ako diktador!
Bongbong: Oops, I’m sorry Mr. Symbolic President.
NoyNoy: Sumusobra ka na! ang pagiging sobra ang dahilan kung bakit kayo pinalayas ng people power sa edsa. you’re way out of line!

Bongbong: Out of line??? no! we’re so back! isa sa senado, isa sa kamara at isang gobernadora.
NoyNoy: WALANG STATE BURIAL!
Bongbong: Ha-ha-ha, now you’re talking! fine!

NoyNoy: Tapusin na natin ‘tong usapang ‘to. stop txting me!
Bongbong: Agad? i’m just warming up.
NoyNoy: Maghanap ka ng kausap mo.
Bongbong: May ipapakilala akong chick. 25 lang. maputi, mahilig sa jazz music.
NoyNoy: Huwag mo akong daanin sa babae. sa dami ng problema ng bansa these days, women are the least of my concerns.
Bongbong: Talaga? ok. fine. bye!
NoyNoy: Sandali lang!!! chinita ba?

Note: Bongbong Marcos didn’t reply. An aide said, “Na-check operator services po si Sir.”

Credit: The Professional Heckler

Comments

Anonymous said…
you should credit http://professionalheckler.wordpress.com/2011/03/01/noynoy-vs-bongbong/ for this post... : )
6:09 AM
Unknown said…
Noted. I got it from an e-mail with no source.
3:06 PM
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